How Could She Be Fifteen?

  

   Today as I write it is my oldest daughter’s 15^th birthday, and I cannot help but reminisce over the journey that we have shared.  Fourteen years ago today, we celebrated her birthday with a decorated cake but without a daughter.  We held her picture in our hands and dreamed…she was not with us at the time.  Two weeks following, we would travel to Guangzhou, China to receive a blessing of a lifetime.  It was only the second tax season that I can remember where work was the farthest from my husband’s mind in late March – early April.  There was nothing more important to him than becoming a dad.  Anyone who knows Pete knows how he values his family, even when we cannot spend time with him during this very hectic season. 

     Our daughter is now busy too.  Teenage years are known for this.  It is a rare occasion when our high school daughter doesn’t have something pressing on her schedule.  For the past several weeks it has been driver’s education and school work.  Now she has added track practice and track meets to the list.  She splits her attention between school, band, sports, friendships, babysitting, family, and church.  Isn’t it interesting, but normal, that family and church tag along behind the rest?

     In preparing for an upcoming Women’s Bible study that I teach, I received a gentle nudge to dig deeper and investigate some information that I found troubling about teen trends.  Statistics show us that a child will spend 8 times more hours watching television compared with spiritual growth.  They will spend 7 times more hours in educational pursuits as well.  When one knows our God of creation and what He designed us for, this is a very scary thought.  As frightening as that thought may be, my research turned up statistics that were far less flattering.  From a government website[1], the average teenage girl spends 7.7 more time grooming and 7.5 more time eating than she will spend on spiritual development per week.  Although this statistic may not seem shocking to everyone, she will spend 16.6 more time in social media than seeking spiritual understanding.  Social media accounts for about 10% of a typical teenager's time.  My husband and I have been far more diligent in monitoring how our children spend their time than these statistics reveal; however, I have to believe these numbers when making observations of the world around us.  

     Proverbs 22:6 (ESV) teaches us (as parents) to “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”  In today’s world, it is much more difficult to capture our children's (teen's) attention, but it is important that we do.  The Bible tells us that “many false prophets will rise and lead many astray” Matthew 24:11 (ESV).  I am sad to say we are praying for many young adults right now who have been influenced and moved away from their beliefs in Christ.  There is so much influencing our kids today:  education, friendships, social media, electronics, music, and books.  As much as we try, it is not possible to be involved in as many areas as we might like.  Think about the influences of books on the avid reader, or the lyrics that we cannot hear because our kids are listening through earbuds.  Screen-time was much easier to control before school-issued chrome books left us guessing what is homework and what is not.  How many devices does Satan use to control the minds of our families without our ability to manage them?   The Bible teaches, “for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light.  So it is no surprise if his servants, also disguise themselves as servants of righteousness.  Their end will correspond to their deeds” 2 Corinthians 11:14-15 (ESV). 

     Although time is not on our side, we still find a way to carve out 8 hours a week for family meals where we share conversations around the breakfast and dinner table.   We take this family time to read simple devotions, pray together and discuss how we intercede for others in our prayers.  We watch television programs together being highly selective on what we choose.  We add things like ‘Right Now Media’ and ‘Pureflix’ to our viewing enjoyment so that we can watch programs specifically geared to Christian families. Whether I am writing articles, preparing Bible study, or Sunday school curriculum, I often ask my kids to edit my work.  This guarantees they will be fed spiritual content.  We review our notes from church and discuss what the kids are learning in their youth programs.  Our kids serve in ministries alongside us and help create games or crafts for younger children as we prepare lesson plans.  It is relevant that our kids observe us going to the Scriptures for guidance.  We try to teach them practial application from age-old stories found in both the Old and New Testaments.  We have many conversations about financial stewardship, and we often speak about needs versus desires.  Unless it feels like we are swimming upstream or going against the current, it is difficult to recognize what it means to be set apart from the world.  I remember from my childhood I was often taught this lesson with a long list of “don’ts, can’ts and shouldn’ts,” but that is not the way I wish to raise our kids.  I would much rather teach them the ‘whys” along with the understanding that we will mess up from time to time, but repentance brings forgiveness.

     Well I can't say that I was expecting to get into philosophical thoughts about raising children for the Lord; however, I hope this article brings vertical vision to a horizontal world.  Our children / teens need us now more than ever to focus on things above.  I cannot help but quote the lyrics to an old country music song called EAST BOUND and DOWN  where it says, "We got a long way to go, and a short time to get there."  Although this song is delivering beer to Texas on time, I pray our thoughts outweigh this mission.  Let's not forget the importance of the job God has entrusted to us.

Endnotes:
[1] Source:  https://www.hhs.gov/ash/oah/facts-and-stats/day-in-the-life/index.html#all