Women Behaving Badly - Part Two

     As part one concludes, we have received an introduction to "praise", the fourth son of Leah called Judah.  We learned that Judah's name meant to praise.  We know that because of "praise",  the world has hope.  This hope came through the descendants of Judah when God became flesh and dwelled among us.  

     Now the story shifts to the younger sister, Rachel.  How has her barren condition placed one more nail in the coffin?  Rachel expresses her grief to Jacob telling him that she is dying inside.  Scriptures tell us, “When Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, she envied her sister.  She said to Jacob, “Give me children, or I shall die!”  (Genesis 30:1 ESV)  At first glance, it may seem that Rachel is a drama queen, but think about this:  How would you feel if your words of envy, at a hormonal moment, were broadcast as a permanent record for millions of people to read, over thousands of years?   Rachel's story may speak to the hearts of many women who face infertility and feel the same way she did.  The transparent teaching we receive in Genesis regarding Rachel can bring healing.  It is easy to see what envy and jealousy can look like when we read of the rising conflict between Leah and Rachel.  Each woman provides a glimpse of what sin looks like when bitterness is allowed a dwelling place in the heart.

     Jacob, angered by her outburst said, “Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?”  Isn’t it interesting that we do not see Jacob pleading with God to remove his wife's barren condition nor her heartbreak?  We see a contrasting response to barrenness when we look at Jacob's father Isaac.  In his love story with Rebekah (Jacob's mother), she is also barren.  For twenty years of marriage, Rebekah bore no children, but we read that Isaac prayed on behalf of his wife and she conceived (twins).  Jacob and Esau were the recipients of that prayer.  If it had not been for that prayer, Jacob and Esau might have never been born.    We take so much for granted.  Not feeling slighted in the baby boy department, it may have never dawned on Jacob to lead his family any differently than he did.  I write, hopefully not perceived as judgmental, I wish to point us toward an application in our own lives.  Are you more like Jacob, or are you more like his father Isaac in making your family requests known to God?

     Rachel, following in the footsteps of Jacob’s grandmother and her great grandmother Sarah, decides to suggest that her servant Bilhah become the surrogate mother to produce offspring on her behalf.  The idea of taking on a concubine for child-bearing purposes never seems to cross Jacob’s mind as problematic.  Didn’t he observe the struggles between the two women he called wives vying for his attention?  Two sons later, Dan and Naphtali, were born to Bilhah.  They became the rightful property of mistress Rachel.  The first son she named “judgment” as she said, “God has judged me, and has also heard my voice and given me a son.”  (Genesis 30:6 ESV)  Her proclamation implies her vindication, a wrong had been made right.  The story doesn’t tell us that complications arose from adding one more woman to the marriage tent; however, we can only imagine that snide remarks were crossing between sides of Jacob’s camp like trash talk at an NFL playoff.  Naphtali’s name acknowledges this struggle between Leah and Rachel as we learn his name means “wrestling”. Rachel expresses frustration when she states, “with mighty wrestlings, I have wrestled with my sister and have prevailed.”  (Genesis 30:8 ESV)  
     How might son-in-law, Jacob, and father-in-law, Laban, discuss the family feud they had created?  I'm sure if they saw either Leah or Rachel approaching from a distance they would run for cover.  Like a heavy-weight match, each woman found themselves in opposing corners of the ring.  Not that we are keeping score, but the count is now:  Leah – four and Rachel – two.  Six children have been born into this dysfunctional family and carry the battle scars of their mother’s fighting.  As you would hope, maybe mothers would come together to raise their children and put this competition to rest.  The nonsense between these two sisters should be winding down, but instead, it seems to be gaining momentum.

     Leah becomes dissatisfied that the children on her sister’s side of the camp are closing the gap and taking away the advantage she has with her husband's attention.  She decides to “up the ante” and add her servant, Zilpah to the mix.  Another concubine, what man could be luckier than Jacob?  This competition between his wives was making his life sweet, except when hearing them complain about one another, Lord knows how women love to nag.  However, Leah’s spirits rose with glee when Zilpah had provided another son, one named Gad, or “good fortune”. (Genesis 30:11 ESV) Not long after Asher arrived and with his birth, Leah did a happy dance as she exclaimed, “Happy am I”.  (Genesis 30:13 ESV)  Whether this happiness was passed along to Asher, the eighth son of Jacob, and the sixth son to Leah, because of the contribution of Zilpah, we don't know.  How happy can children be when they see their dad passing from tent to tent as if they had revolving doors.  How content can they be to have their mothers barely speaking placing their hands on their hips and huffing and puffing with hopes of blowing each other's tent out of town?  Children in this family represented hatred, strife, competition, and anger.  Although they have tiny feet, it is good that we put our feet in their shoes.   How do children feel when they are part of a polygamous family that does not get along?

     Following Zilpah’s two pregnancies, Leah learns that she is with child again, not once, but twice more.  Issachar indicates that Leah felt she was due commendations from God for bravely giving her servant Zilpah for her husband’s pleasure.  “God has given my wages because I gave my servant to my husband,” (Genesis 30:18) was the prevailing thought as she gave birth to him.  How distorted is one’s thinking when we feel that God owes us something.  The lesson we can learn here is how selfish it appears when we make something all about us.  Then came Zebulun, son number ten for Jacob.  We are late in the third quarter and now see that the score is Leah – eight, Rachel – two; or have we lost interest in keeping track?  As Leah named Zebulun she thought, “God has endowed me with a good endowment, now my husband will honor me because I have borne him six sons.”  (Genesis 30:20 ESV).  Even if we had grown tired of keeping track, it is evident that Leah had not, she was still counting. 

     Does your stomach turn just a bit when you think about the value assigned to Jacob’s children?  As we observe this story, is it not with the intention of looking for the golden nugget of application for our lives rather than judge a prior generation.  This story speaks powerfully of the fall of humanity.  It had not been that many generations since God had decided to judge humankind because “The Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.”  (Genesis 6:5 ESV)  We have barely traveled two chapters in the Holy Scriptures and see that on account of one exceptionally dysfunctional family, God has shown mercy.  Mercy by definition is withholding the judgment we deserve.  God's goodness is on display here.

     If we are up for the task, can we ask God how we contribute to sin by placing our selfish pursuits above our focus on Him?  Ask yourself:  (1)  Who am I competing with for attention?, (2) Where do I make comparisons?, (3) When do I feel entitled?, (4) What dysfunctional behavior needs resolution in my family?, and (5) How often do I seek God to heal my wounds rather than wallow in a state of victimhood? 

     The story is not over yet.  We learn that God opens Rachel's womb and she gives birth to two sons.  The first she names Joseph from which she proclaims, “God has taken away my reproach.” in other words, God is no longer mad at me.  It appears that gratitude is missing when Rachel tells God she needs more to be satisfied:  “May the LORD add to me another son!”   (Genesis 30:23-24 ESV).  Do we see evidence that Jacob and his family have discovered the errors in their ways?  This doesn't appear to be a happily-ever-after story.  Just like favoritism in Jacob's family of origin, Joseph seems to have come upon the most favored status too.  We soon learn that God grants Rachel one more child, but this child comes with a price, her life.  She names her son Ben-Oni with her last breath.  His name means “son of my sorrows.”  Rachel must have known that her life was ending.  Jacob quickly renamed him, Benjamin, meaning “son of my right hand”.(Genesis 35:16-19)  Benjamin is the only son of Jacob’s twelve sons that he named.  It appears that Jacob has recognized the value of children with this respectful name.  I am grateful that we have this story in the Bible because it gives us an opportunity to examine our own lives by the example left for us.  “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction and for training in righteousness.”  (2 Timothy 3:16 ESV) .  What conclusions do you draw from this story?